The Mystery of Theodosia Burr Alston: A Mini-Essay

     In December of 1812, Theodosia Burr Alston, the twenty-nine-year-old wife of South Carolina Governor John Alston, set sail from Georgetown aboard the schooner Patriot to visit her father, former vice-president Aaron Burr, in New York.[1] A month later, the abandoned vessel was found floating off Nags Head. As news of the incident spread, speculations grew. Some argued that the passengers and crew abandoned the schooner when she encountered a storm off Cape Hatteras, others believed that pirates pillaged the ship and slaughtered everyone, and a few contended that those aboard had been captured and sold into slavery, with Theodosia's renowned beauty swaying one of the pillagers into sparing her from the same fate and taking her as a bride.[2] In 1869, a New York doctor, William Pool, added an additional plot to the Patriot myth when he claimed that he had tended to an ailing old woman, who had been rescued from the sea by a fisherman and his wife and raised as their own daughter for decades. As payment for his services, Pool was allowed to take one item from the house. When he selected the portrait of a beautiful young women, the aged spinster leapt from the bed and grabbed it from his hands, screaming that it was a present for her father in New York and the doctor could not have it.[3] Despite claims by archaeologist James Michie that previous theories regarding the ship’s abandonment during a storm are the most plausible, popular folklore continues to this day, with local legends maintaining that the ghost of Theodosia, dressed all in white, meanders Huntington Beach on Nags Head as she perpetually revisits the sight of her death.[4] 

Works Referenced

Cawthorne, Nigel. Shipwrecks: Disasters of the Deep Seas. New York: Metro Books, 2013.
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[1] Cawthorne, 121.
[2] Cawthorne, 121.
[3] Cawthorne, 121.
[4] Cawthrone, 121.

Rice Krispies Cake

$20 - $25 (based on 2016 prices)

Makes one cake

For her birthday, a friend presented me with a baking challenge: "make me a cake without using any batter." After pondering the idea for a while, I settled on Rice Krispies treats. I selected a black-and-white color scheme; however, your version can be far more colorful - consider dying the marshmallow mixture with food coloring or using Fruity Pebbles for a polychromatic effect.  

• 12 Cups miniature marshmallows
• 12 Cups Rice Krispies cereal
• 6 Cups Cocoa Krispies cereal  
• 1 Cup butter
• 1 Cup dark chocolate chips

1. In large saucepan, melt 1/4 cup of butter over low heat.

2. Add four cups of marshmallows to the butter and stir until they are completely melted.

3. Remove the mixture from the heat and add six cups of cereal, stirring until the cereal is well coated.

4. Press the mixture evenly into a greased baking pan and allow it to cool. Since you will stack each layer, consider resting a second pan on the top of the mixture to give it a level surface.

5. Repeat steps one through four with Cocoa Krispies and Rice Krispies to form two additional layers. You, of course, are free to incorporate as many tiers as you desire and in whichever flavors or colors you wish.

6. Once the layers have cooled, remove them from their pans and stack them. You could alternate colors, cut patterns into them with cookie cutters, or shape them into certain designs.

7. Combine chocolate chips with a tablespoon of butter and, in a double boiler, warm the mixture over low heat until it completely melts. To prevent it from burning, stir it repeatedly with a whisk.

8. Drizzle the cake plate and the top of the cake with the melted chocolate. Your application can be random and haphazard or planned and delicate.

9. For decorative touches, drizzle the remaining chocolate onto wax paper and freeze the designs overnight. Here, too, you can create chaotic clusters or intricate patterns.

10. Directly before serving, top the cake with a dollop of whipped cream and the frozen chocolate drizzles.  

"Yule Horror" (A Poem)

Although recently renamed “Festival” in modern anthologies, H.P. Lovecraft’s poem was first published as “Yule Horror” in the December, 1926, issue of Weird Tales.[1] Inspired by the publication’s editor, Farnsworth Wright, the work’s fourth stanza, which refers to Wright as “an abbot and priest” who attends a “devil-wrought feast,” was originally removed from the magazine because the editor felt its reference was too obvious to readers.[2]

There is snow on the ground,
And the valleys are cold,
And a midnight profound
Blackly squats o’er the wold;
But a light on the hilltops half-seen hints of feastings unhallow’d and old.

There is death in the clouds,
There is fear in the night,
For the dead in their shrouds
Hail the sun’s turning flight,
And chant wild in the woods as they dance round a Yule-altar fungous and white.

To no gale of earth’s kind
Sways the forest of oak,
Where the sick boughs entwin’d
By mad mistletoes choke,
For these pow’rs are the pow’rs of the dark, from the graves of the lost Druid-folk.

And mayst thou to such deeds
Be an abbot and priest,
Singing cannibal greeds
At each devil-wrought feast,
And to all the incredulous world shewing dimly the sign of the beast.[3]

Works Referenced

Joshi, S.T. and David Schultz. An H.P. Lovecraft Encyclopedia. Westport, CT: Greenwood Press, 2001.

Lovecraft, H.P. “Yule Horror.” Weird Tales 8.6 (1926): 846.

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[1] Joshi and Schultz, 92. 

[2] Joshi and Schultz, 92. 

[3] Lovecraft, 846.

Skull Candy Apples

$8 - $10 (based on 2017 prices)

Makes one platter containing three apples

The company I work for has an unofficial decorating contest between offices. For 2017, we decided to pull out all the stops and decorate the entire building. One of the rooms was a twisted circus. Although I have never been fond of the killer clown theme, the concept did give me a chance to explore the circus idea without relying too heavily on clowns. Since the display went up in the middle of September and did not come down until slightly after the start of November, I did not want to use actual food. I originally intended to use fake apples for this prop; however, I failed to find them in several craft stores. In a creative pinch, I used the skulls and, to be entirely honest, the final result is far more fun and intriguing.

• Three small, apple-size skulls
• One twelve-inch plastic charger
• One 3/16” wooden dowel
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in ravishing red*
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in tropical mango*
• One 0.44 oz. bottle of clear nail polish*

1. On a newspaper-lined surface in a well-ventilated area, give the skulls three coats of red paint. Depending on your desired coverage, you may want more or less. Likewise, you can use a glossy paint to give the props a shiner appearance. I elected to remove the mandibles from my skulls for aesthetic purposes; however, you are free to leave the items intact.

2. Cut the wooden dowel into three six-inch sections. To cater the prop to your specific theme, you can substitute the dowels for popsicle sticks or gnarled twigs.

3. Cut small holes in the tops of the skulls and insert the dowels. Although the hot glue in step four will hold them in place, you can use superglue or another adhesive for added support.

4. Use hot glue to create the caramel drip on the top of the skulls. You can fashion a simple puddle along the crowns or an elaborate dribble that trickles down the sides and onto the charger.

5. Give the dripping three coats of tropical mango paint. Although I used three coats, you may want more or less.

6. Use clear nail polish to give the paint a glossy appearance. I used two coats; however, you are free to apply as many coats as you feel necessary.

7. Glue the apples to the plastic charger. I used hot glue, but you can use superglue for a sturdier hold. You might consider purchasing a charger that is a different color than your apples or covering portions with multicolored paper to provide contrast.

8. For additional detail, use one of the distressed playing cards fabricated for the carnival signs or the “fun house” and “tickets” signs to fashion a label for the prop. To maintain consistency, use cherry cobbler paint and the same scratchy writing style for the wording.

9. Further touches can be added to amplify the prop’s appearance, such as plastic insects crawling on and around the apples or a few strategically placed severed ears and fingers.

*You will not use the entire bottle’s content for this project.

The Corpse as a Warning: A Mini-Essay

     In Sir Thomas Malory’s Le Morte d’Arthur, Sir Beaumains, on his way to a rescue Dame Liones, encounters the bodies of fellow knights hung from the limbs of trees, their shields draped around their necks and their swords dangling from their heels. Unnerved by the sight, Sir Beaumains learns that the hapless souls were killed by the Red Knight in their efforts to save the damsel and their corpses were boldly displayed to warn others attempting the same feat.[1] The Red Knight’s actions are not a lone occurrence. Indeed, history is filled with instances of displayed corpses serving as a warning to others. During the eighteenth century, at the height of pirate activity, the corpses of executed swashbucklers were chained into iron cages, known as gibbets, and publicly displayed as forewarnings to other potential criminals.[2] The tight-fitting gibbet, which prevented family members from removing the body and burying it, was custom made for each criminal and period accounts recall how the measuring process for this device was often more dreaded than the execution itself.[3] In fact, the gibbets proved an intimidating sight – crows picked the flesh off the dead and the sun bleached their remains to a ghastly white.[4] A century later, the scene was repeated numerous times throughout the developing territories of the western United States and in the racially charged southern states: the former using the hung outlaws, like those of pirates, to sway lawlessness and the latter sadly utilizing the bodies of lynched individuals to reinforce segregation.[5] The most famous employment of the corpse as a warning occurred during the fifteenth century with the Romanian leader Vlad Ţepeş, who, according to recounts penned by Chalcondyles, impaled the bodies of defeated armies on wooden stakes and used them to terrify his enemies, including the Turks.[6] 

Works Referenced

Florescu, Radu and Raymond McNally. Dracula, Prince of Many Faces: His Life and His Times. New York: Hachette Book Group, 1989.

Litwack, Leon. “Hellhounds.” Without Sanctuary: Lynching Photography in America. Ed. James Allen. Santa Fe, NM: Twin Palms Publishers, 2008. 8-37.

Malory, Thomas. Le Morte d’Arthur. 1485. New York: Barnes and Noble, 2015.

Rediker, Marcus. Villains of all Nations: Atlantic Pirates in the Golden Age. Boston: Beacon Press, 2004.

Tarlow, Sarah. The Golden and Ghoulish Age of the Gibbet in Britain. Basingstoke: Palgrave Macmillan, 2017.
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[1] Malory, 218-220.
[2] Rediker, 164.
[3] Tarlow, 20-23.
[4] Rediker, 164.
[5] Litwack, 13-15.
[6] Florescu and McNally, 148.

Stigmata Statue

$40 - $50 (based on 2017 prices)

Makes one statue

This prop was featured in the opening room of 2017’s haunted house, which was decorated like an old Spanish church. To add eerie touches and enhance the atmosphere, I emphasized certain elements of Catholicism. Unlike the stigmata bust, where I replaced the blood with blackened goo, I maintained the traditional stigmata with this statue. To cut the project’s cost, consider purchasing the statue at a second-hand store or on clearance.

• One twenty-four-inch resin garden statue
• One 10 oz. cans of interior/exterior, fast-drying spray paint in desert bisque
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in cherry cobbler*
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in flat black*
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in flat brown*
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in flat gray*
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in flat white*
• One 0.44 oz. bottle of clear nail polish*
  

1. On a newspaper-lined surface in a well-ventilated area, give the statue an even coat of desert bisque spray paint. Depending on the type of stone you plan to emulate, you may want to select a darker or lighter hue. Likewise, you could elect for a smooth surface or one with a stippled effect.

2. Dry brush gray into the nooks and crannies of the statue. You want to focus on areas where weatherization would occur and sediment would accumulate: in the folds of fabric, the curls of hair, and the creases of fingers and facial features.

3. Repeat the procedure in step two with black paint, ensuring you center your application on portions which would normally experience exposure to the elements. Although I worked from light to dark to achieve a heavily weathered appearance, you could work from dark to light (flipping steps two and three) for a milder aging process.

4. Gently dry brush white over the surface of the statue. You want this coverage to lightly accent the black and gray, so be sparing in your application. If it helps, practice on a piece of cardboard first.

5. Create a wash of brown paint and allow it to run down the statue. As with the previous steps, you want this to mirror what occurs in nature. Hence, concentrate on portions where rain would typically flow. The shade of dirt depends on your ratio of paint to water: less water will produce a darker brown; more water will yield a fainter hue.

6. Use red paint to darken the eyes and create a dripping effect. Try to simulate running mascara by exaggerating the streams and bringing them down toward the jawline. Repeat the process with the hands, tracing strands between the fingers and allowing them to run along the curvature of the forearms.

7. Use clear nail polish to give the paint a glossy appearance. I used two coats; however, you are free to apply as many coats as you feel necessary.

8. If you plan to display the prop outside for an extended period of time, consider applying a sealer to prevent the weather from damaging the paint.

*You will not use the entire bottle’s content for this project.

Pumpkin Dolls

$20 - $25 (based on 2017 prices)

Makes four dolls

The farm theme for 2016’s haunt left me with numerous pumpkins and I have spent the last few years finding ways to repurpose them. For this prop, I decided to fabricate dolls out of the mini-pumpkins purchased to accentuate portions of the display. Creepy dolls are always a nice addition to several yard-haunt themes, especially since many people find them unnerving.

• Four twelve-inch dolls with vinyl limbs and heads 
• Four stout mini-pumpkins 
• Four tall mini-pumpkins 
• One 8 oz. bottle of wood glue* 
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in au natural* 
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in flat black* 
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in hot cocoa* 
• One 2 oz. bottle of acrylic paint in spice brown* 
• One package of white pipe cleaners (one dozen per package) 
• One ten-yard roll of brown duct tape 
• One 10 oz. cans of interior/exterior, fast-drying spray paint in nutmeg

1. Dismember the dolls and remove their clothing. On a newspaper-lined surface in a well-ventilated area, paint their limbs and heads black. Although I only used one coat, you may want more depending on your desired coverage. Keep in mind, though, that this is the base coat for the crackle paint and much of it will be covered up by the second layer. While I chose black, you can use a different color to tailor the props for your specific needs.

2. Once the paint has dried, use a thick brush to apply a smattering of wood glue to the prop. Try not to over think your application (a random pattern produces the best results). Also, it may be easier to work with one limb at a time rather than attempting to glue and paint all the pieces at once.

3. Let the glue sit for a minute to become tacky and then cover the limbs with hot cocoa paint. Here, too, I only used one coat; however, you may want more. As the glue and paint dry, they will form cracks, making the base coat visible.

4. Once the glue and paint have fully dried, brush a light coat of au natural and spice brown paint onto the pieces to simulate dirt. During this process, try to focus on areas where dust and grime would normally accumulate: in the lines between fingers and toes, along the creases of elbows and knees, and inside ears and mouths. NOTE: reserve the hands for another project.

5. Detail the faces with various elements: fashion eyes with buttons, seam mouths closed with safety pins, draw astrological symbols across surfaces, and create a dripping effect with black paint. You can make each doll unique or give them a unified appearance.

6. Use pipe cleaners to create the armature for eight sticks. You will use one long piece to form the main staff and attach smaller strands to fabricate twigs. To save time, you can use real sticks and skip steps six through eight.

7. On a newspaper-lined surface in a well-ventilated area, give the sticks an even coat of nutmeg spray paint. Although I only used one coat, you may want more depending on your desired coverage. Keep in mind, though, that this is the base coat and much of the paint will be covered by darker colors.

8. Give the sticks a smudging of au natural, hot cocoa, and spice brown to replicate the look of natural sticks. Depending on your chosen appearance, you can work from either light to dark or dark to light. Once the paint has dried, accentuate the sticks with brushings of black lines.

9. Cut the stems off of the stout mini-pumpkins to form a base and either hot glue or superglue the tall mini-pumpkins to them to construct torsos. If you plan to display these props outdoors in windy conditions, give them additional weight by hollowing out the stout mini-pumpkins and pouring sand or rocks into them.

10. On a newspaper-lined surface in a well-ventilated area, give the pumpkin bodies a dusting of nutmeg and a splattering of brown to replicate dirt. You could also apply a flecking of black to enhance the appearance.

11. Attach the heads to the bodies with either hot glue or super glue. Depending on how small these items are, you may have to remove the stems from the tall mini-pumpkins as well.

12. Punch holes into the torsos and glue the sticks in place. Their positioning depends on your chosen appearance of the prop. Use the wire armature inside the sticks to bend them into your desired shapes. If possible, try to make them appear as though they are reaching menacingly outward.

13. You could embellish the props with additional elements – chicken feathers or dried corn husks – to amplify their frightening appearance.

*You will not use the entire bottle’s content for this project.